Blasphemy
Oh, I’m going to catch sooooo much crap for this. I saw this image over at Regretsy – Not Remotely Steampunk, which is a short collection of things that have been marketed as Steampunk but clearly are not.
And now some humor at Jesus’ expense, a.k.a. blasphemy.
I made this up just for the occassion:
Facepalm 23 (Colonel Jamison Version)
1 The LORD is my Captain; I shall not mutiny.
2 He telleth me to lie low under cannon fire: he directeth me to guard the cargo holds.
3 He replenisheth my coal: he guideth me in the deeds of valor for our country’s sake.
4 Aye, though I sail through the chasm of certain doom, I will fear no misdeeds: for thou art steamy; thy wit and thy craft they humor me.
5 Thou engineereth a platform before me in the presence of mine admirers: thou promotest me to high station; my aether runneth over.
6 Surely opportunity and treasure shall follow me to the ends of the Earth: and I will occupy a flat in the hostel of the Captain for a long while.
My personal favorite Jesus joke that I tell at all the Atheist parties:
Jesus walks into an Inn (stop me if you’ve heard this one); Jesus walks into an in, hands the Inn Keeper three nails and says “can you put me up for the night?”
I’m going to burn in Hell. I can see God saying to me as he tosses me into the lake of fire, “who’s laughing now, bitch?” And as I plummet towards my eternity, my final words to the Lord Almighty shall be “is that all you got?”
Stay tuned for my next blasphemous image, a Steampunk depiction of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him).
Known as the Magnanimous and Beneficent Doctor Warthan, I disseminate the propaganda of SteamPunk through a special series of psychological formulae that I have designated Omega7Red.
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What? You don’t think God has a sense of humor? He must… look… you were born. ;P
Actually most of it was funny. In my opinion you lost it at “for thou art steamy; thy wit and thy craft they humor me.” and “Thou engineereth a platform before me in the presence of mine admirers” … the steamy one was really reaching and the last one was way too fashion runwayish.
Meh, I’m not a poet.